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If she can’t handle that dark, hungry, far-from-gentle part of me, then she can’t handle the rest of my story.
Any other time, that would be enough for me to pull back.
But not tonight. Tonight, I need her to understand everything is not roses and chocolates. It’s fucking, just to get a high that makes you forget the blood and pain, and that is not even a little bit gentle. That’s not lovemaking. That is grinding it out, roughing it up, until nothing exists but pleasure. And it’s about control. It’s about the world stripping it away and my need to claim it again, which is what I’m trying to do with Waters. But she isn’t listening. She has to listen.
I now know that means no turning back.
“You trust me?” I challenge softly.
Her lips part and she whispers, “You know I do.”
“Show me and I’ll tell you anything you want.”
“I’ve already shown you,” she says. “You know I trust you.”
She doesn’t understand but she will. “Show me again,” I say.
“All right,” she says. “What do you want right now, Adrian? Tell me.”
Her. I want her for the rest of my life, but even above that, I want her alive and happy. Her life over my life. That’s what this is about. The room darkens, the cloud just behind Pri outside the window is heavy with the promise of rain, ready to burst. An ominous reminder of how explosive and ready to burst our situation has become.
Her rebellion is instant. “And if I don’t?”
“I’ll punish you,” I say, my voice absolute.
Her eyes go wide. “How?”
I leave that question unanswered. “Undress,” I order softly.
I step backward and sit on the couch that faces the window, leaving two oversized—and perhaps useful before this is over—chairs free. I’m now in a position to watch her, to dominate her, and there is a flicker of uncertainty in her eyes that tells me she’s aware of this fact. She’s a woman who prefers control. Giving it away will not be easy for her. Giving it away is a sign of ultimate trust.
Her eyes narrow on me and for a moment I see rebellion, but then there’s a softening of her expression that I know to be the first hints of submission.